The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
plan parent hood is for high school, im at the abortion clinic, so college.
I feel like my life has just been one 21 year long episode of "i shouldn't be alive"
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
the "its better than getting an actual virus from an actual porn star" argument failed.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
btw theres a pine tree in the downstairs shower. the guys thought it would be a great free air freshener.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
can you take a pic of your glorious tits but not send it just yet? I need motivation to finish this bull shit presentation.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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