I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
Instead of having sex, we spent the entire night making pillow forts and have sword fights. I think I'm in love
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
I plan on gettn treatment center drunk
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Build a thousand brigdes, lick one butthole. What am I remembered for? Buttholelicking.
I just found a To Do list on the table, written by me last night, that just says "1. Go downstairs. 2. Get Pickles. 3. Laptop"
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
I smell like heartbreak.
Tequila and sloppy rebound sex?
How did you know?
Randomize
