i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
Nevermine. I'm just going to tell you on Myspace with a glitter graphic.
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
I was very proud of myself that day. I had an awesome time. I don't care if I negatively impacted others.
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
He stumbled into my room, flopped on my bed, shoes on my pillow and asked me for a juice box. Then fell asleep with the juice box on his forehead.
What's the address and code again...does anyone need anything and why is my viking helmet on the bed?
May or may not have just put tequila in my special "kids+" orange juice fortified with vitamins a, b, c, d, e, and now t.
You literally spelled every word wrong or with numbers except for "drunk", which you used all caps for.
I felt the need to accentuate it....
who knew tequila and Christmas cookies would go so well together
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