You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
we're using his nephews tonka truck toy as a cooler for the beer
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its funny that for once I get home and I'm just as high as my parents are.
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
my biography would be titled "haunting truths and dick jokes: a tale of love, loss, and masturbation."
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
Whoever decided to put a Denny's that close to the strip club is a genius.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I legit just swiped right with a Tinder feminist just to get in an argument with her. Soo that's my Friday night so far...
So, my eyeglasses somehow ended up in my nightstand drawer and they're covered in lube.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
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