therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
i mean you're really good at taking the morning after pill...so you could put that on your resume..
yeah, i think fast in a bad sitatuion and am able to react with appropriate measures
It was like a fairy tale, until he tried to put it in my ass...
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i wish that i had sketchier friends so that it would be easier to get drugs
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
It was the best present I've gotten since I was 5 and I got a fucking easy bake oven. I'm not pregnant for realsies. Celebratory party at the house tonight. Invite all the nice dicks you know.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
So it's my mom's birthday and I wanted to be super cheap and just walk up to her and say "I got you the greatest gift ever, mom! I'm actually sober right now!".
just had sex in the back of my high school auditorium #dreamcumtrue
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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