Why did you take off so early
No more beer. And also. Threesome. Maybe. Ill let you know.
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Just woke up to find myself cooking eggs on the imaginary stove in my room.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Sober Sundays just aren't working out anymore.
Queso dip and pictures of Daniel's penis. It's like the last days of Rome over here.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
I was looking at our sex bingo and pretty much every single row or column has at least one kind of person that is harder to find than all the rest
We've made things harder for ourselves
The struggle will be part of the fun
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
My vagina is officially offended.
My loniness meter has reached its peak. I just played shadow puppets using my Big Mac on the wall with my cats
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Randomize
