I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
EW EW EW EW THAT PENIS BELONGS TO SOMEONE'S FATHER! THAT PENIS BELONGS TO OUR FRIEND'S FATHER! THAT PENIS HELPED CREATE OUR FRIEND! YOU'RE NOT ALLOWED TO ADMIRE IT!
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
And I told him that even though were not together, if he has sex with anyone I would have sex with someone else, video tape it and send it to him.
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
Safe to say we should stock up on nipple bandaids ladies
if I hear Wonderful Christmastime one more time I'm putting my foot up Paul McCartney's ass.
Randomize
