Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
He's trying to get everyone in the bathtub for a team meeting about how we're gonna find his car. Which is parked outside. Think we should cut him off?
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
You were yelling at the bowl of salad and telling it to quit taunting you and telling you to go to tacobell
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
So it turns out high me is very efficient. I set 5 alarms to remind me to do things, i made mac and cheese, and i wrote a poem. I'm going places.
Randomize
