My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
I really love her but I don't think I can go the rest of my life without anal.
My dog ate my bag of weed. Thats not the easiest call to the vet to make.
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
nothing like Chinese food and masturbating on a Saturday night
Sometimes one must go to great lengths and make great sacrifices to get drunk. I willingly accept the challenge.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
He's my ex's boss. I'm not above sleeping with him for that fact alone.
I can't possibly be the only person who has ever eaten Cheetos with a spoon to avoid the powder getting in my fingers
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
DIBS on your mom for my beer pong partner.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
Randomize