I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
I'm surrounded by 3 year olds in tutus. They are far too innocent to be within at least 500 ft of me.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
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she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
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I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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