Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
my three year anniversary of no dick sucking is coming up. you can throw me a party with a penis cake.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
My neighbor is on the his front porch in a robe dipping a popsicle into what appears to be vodka. I want to be his son.
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
Unless you have figured out how to blow me through the phone don't drunk dial me.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
He tried to tip me with his police badge...
and you didn't accept WHY?!
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize
