Hey I don't know if you will get this but all I know is you are so beautiful to .ee and? I dare anyone to stop me me from caring for you ante so beautiful so I kid you not gorgeous iyoiu are so beautiful to me i dare som.eone too stioo you
Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
But I don't consider them one night stands. They're auditions.
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
Come on... In this relationship-economy, you gotta have "awesome blowjobs" on your resume.
he locked me out then poked me with a fork when i tried to get in through the window
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
I was sending him tit pics while watching how to train your dragon 2. It was everything.
She tried to fuck me right at the bar in front of everyone. She actually got my pants unzipped before I realized what was going on.
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