Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
The nurse told me they're using the same medicine that killed michael jackson.
Do you ever wonder how many people have prayed for you to be a better person?
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
I don't know about this Sanders guy after all. I'm voting for MYSTERY BABYLON, WHORE OF ALL THE EARTH
Hillary?
Listen, some people have dreams, some people just want to cock slap a kangaroo
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
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