he is naked. in. my. bed. happiest day. of my. LIFE.
Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
i am sick of getting naked and seeing how fat i am.
I thought he was joking about the hundred beer challenge until two guys showed up with a camera and boom mic. This cabin party is going to be fucked
Just found a ramen cup in the stall and all of the showers running with no one in them. WHERE ARE YOU?
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
I think I fixed my testicle. That's why I didnt pay $25 for a doctor to do it
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
I flashed some kids doing a church car wash. I feel like I really improved the quality of their lives.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
I woke up at 3am, top off, with campus security telling me to get dressed. Tonight was a GOOD NIGHT
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
There is a baby in my apartment. What the fuck happened last night?
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