Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
When she gives birth, I'm so playing 'Eye of the Tiger'
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
She tied her key to her bra the night before and couldn't get it off while trying to open the door this morning so she just took her bra off and let it tangle from the key while unlocking the door...the old Indian couple next door were shocked.
I don't know why I do this to myself his dick is a constant source of disappointment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
He really only has clothes, like 4 boogie boards, and a bong here.
Can you come get me? I woke up in the woods behind the Super 8. I have pizza.
Please don't finger me like a jackhammer. I'm a woman not a construction site.
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
My son's girlfriend just thanked me for having good penis genes.
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