Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
I think I just was a dick to Paul Rudd.
her voice honestly makes me want to vomit. i have springsteen cranked up all the way.
Remember back in the day when getting fingered in the movie theater was the best thing ever?
New. Vanessa hudgens nude pics
That text made me feel like i signed up for some awesome celeb nude pic reminder
Also, on a completely related note, just came up with an awesome business plan. You in?
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
Just dropped $150 at the liquor store. No power and two feet of snow has taken my alcoholism to another level.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
I just bought condoms at Big Lots. please save this text so you can laugh at me in 9 months
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Idk if you own a vibrator or anything but it's not smart to leave it in dad's car for him to find :/
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
It's starting to get sad how I have this 'new beginning' feeling after every negative pregnancy test
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