It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
i just made mint juleps with bourbon and fresh breath strips. i am the macgyver of alcohol.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I'm really debating making a second facebook. Same name only with DRUNK at the end. That way I can keep the guys I only talk to when I'm drunk on that facebook and only go on it when im drunk.
She is high at the bar - she thinks the bottle of frangelico is aunt jemima telling her to stop doing drugs.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
You text him a porn site address and said GOODBYE ... I think he got the hint
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
I woke up naked on my futon with a blanket half way covering my ass and 20 half eaten chicken wings on my chest... At 7 pm... That kind of day drinking
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
You're wasting your dick. It needs to be bestowed upon the masses.
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
I am drunkenly riding a razor scooter up and down the hills of Cincinnati
What in the fuck are you doing with your life
So I just accidentally joined a bar crawl and got a free shotski of Jameson. I love life.
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