Did you go home with that guy without me?
Sorry boo - it's pouring and I found a boy with a car
We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
I just looked at all of our spring break pictures... there's a guy getting a blow job in the background of the ones on the beach.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
girls shouldnt black out with american flag bandaids on their nips
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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