Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
you should have seen his reaction to my boobs, it was like he just met god
Apparently 'she used to sleep with my brother' is not an acceptable answer to how do you know each other.
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
Apparently william has a "couch montage"...an album of facebook photos of himself on different couches in various states of happiness and despair. A heartwrenching journey through what was clearly a significant part of his life. I'd mock him more but I think the fact that I looked through it means he's already won
Are we doing anything tonight after class for Valentine's Day or just being lazy and having sex?
If you expect me to say anything other than 'lazy and sex' you're crazzzzy!
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
You know you're getting old when 19 year olds you've met on tinder advise you that you should start looking for a wife and/or the mother of your children
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
Wanna get drunk and make some bad decisions?
Are you calling me a bad decision?
Randomize
