You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
Apparently i was the first person to introduce her to her clitoris. Needless to say...they hit it off great
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
I'm pretty sure my penis yawned halfway through. That loose.
I should do something nice for her. Like sign her up for "What Not To Wear."
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
I woke up in a bunk bed beside two Brazilians dude you have no idea how happy I was
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
Randomize
