If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
It's chlamydia! Thank God!
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Oh god establish a safe word
I'm going to! Pineapple.
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Randomize
