Hilbilly word of the day is cedar, example....I knowed she ain\'t got no panties on cuz I cedar cooter.
I don't know where I am, but I'm drinkin & I like these people
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
I was going to text him and apologize but I didn't want him to think that meant I approved of him being my niece's booty call.
I made him ride the giant pony statue in my friends little sisters room before i let him get in the bed.
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
