I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please make the clown in the corner stop judging me. I mean he's the one with paint on his face. I don't need him judge judying me.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
Should I take my grandma to a keg tomorrow or not? Serious question
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
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