well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
so he shaved. down there. and before he took his pants off i thought it was hot but then all i could think about were the naked mole rats from 7 grade science class.
Good seeing you too. Don't worry, you didn't miss out on too much last night. We went to a place where there was supposed to be a wet t-shirt contest, but it was more like two ugly girls dancing around on stage in white shirts. Everyone just wanted them to leave so the band could keep playing
I feel like I should lick our pitcher just so everyone knows its ours
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I'm taking myself to the hospital right now b/c there is no way this erection is subsiding in the next 4 hours.
It'd probably just be a lot of profanity and hyperventilation and deteriorating into tears anyways
so just a regular conversation then
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
I just found weed in my bra #magicboobs2k16
You walked around in your costume going up to every guy saying "I'm a squirrel, give me your nuts"
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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