sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
After all you put him through, I think it was only right that you saluted the bartender when you left.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
She fell down no less than 4 times while we were at the club. One of which was while she was in the bathroom stall next to me.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I nicked my vulva while shaving and I'm about to go on a date where I will be having sex. Which bandaid: My Little Pony or princesses?
Is it unhealthy for me to do shots of pinnacle by myself in my apartment right now? Asking for a friend
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
