There is a stranger person in my roommates bed...
I think I'm going to try and hook up with that blond tonight.
I'm going for alcohol poisoning.
Just bought two budlight beers with a can of tuna at the bar
She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
Basically taped my dick down because it's too obvious in this costume...
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I figured it out! There's blood on the kitchen floor because I fell into the dishwasher. And there's a face dent. And it doesn't work.
Yea.....I saw that happen.
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