You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
You kept spitting the skittles out cause you said they tasted like "balls of sandpaper"
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
how do you always get into these "we banged the same dude now lets be friends" situations???
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
I feel awful. The bartender added me on Facebook and there's chips all over the bathroom floor
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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