So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
It must be a full moon weekend. All of my weird booty calls are coming out of the woodwork. I spent 40 minutes on the phone last night telling one why he is so creepy.
he was so high that he wouldn't speak to anybody for like 30 minutes, he'd only gobble, like a turkey.
that beer fried lasagna last night was sooo good
that wasnt beer fried lasagna, you just poured beer on my lasagna
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He dared me to drink a bottle of olive oil in exchange for a 30 pack... So much for loosing the freshman fifteen this year.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
We also had a full on debate about how realistic and useful teleportation and time travel would be...and only used Twilight Zone episodes as "scientific evidence"
Our motto for the night: BLACK OUT OR BACK OUT.
That's our motto every night.
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
i can't believe i helped you shave your back last night, and she still didn't sleep with you.
THIS IS WHAT CELL PHONES ARE FOR! So you can tell me that you're bringing your coworker who lives in the "Halleleuia community" home for a beer SO I'M NOT DRESSED IN LEATHER LINGERIE WHEN HE WALKS IN THE FUCKING DOOR!!
Randomize