I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
So for a second i just thought clitoris was a disease.
Who knew that one of those cheesy light up equalizer shirts would be the light that all those drunk college girls gathered like moths around?
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
And by "schedule" I meant crumbled up liquor store receipt, that I wrote shit on.
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You should just skip the small talk from now on and instead say something like "You need to come slay the dragon, be here in 15?"
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
I just wanna get drunk in a castle. Is that so much to ask?
I have done everything sexualally imaginable with that umpalumpa
My mom just woke me up with a cowboy hat and sunglasses on. It's 7 am and she's drunk.
I ran into the marine at the grocery store. Its like my vag and his penis have this way of finding each other when I least want it.
Randomize