quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
This is why I'm not putting my name in lights over your bed.
I just saw a like a 30 person deep walk of shame... it was like the million man march but with dorm chicks
he asked me to eat out his asshole. after five minutes of uncomfortable staring i realized he was serious.
we need to stop having unprotected sex.
ya i know. we're like the secret life of the american whores.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
Oh I see how it is...you can snap chat the world your balls but I wear dinosaur feetie pajamas and I'm the "weird one"
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
She called to tell me she just hooked up with my crush...and that he talked about me...not sure if I should be pissed or excited?
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize