Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
You took shots of captn out of a empty percocet bottle, i just saw you fall threw the floor of rock bottom.
Yea i traded my bed for half a bag of jimmy johns jalepno chips, am I proud of it no, Am I happy I did it? yes
This guy just brought his piggy bank into the bar with him. Talk about corruption of childhood.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
All my money is going towards making my vagina hairless
Worth it.
I'm going to be an 8 year old girl down there foreverrrr #fountainofyouth
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just got offered money for pictures of my boobs
I accepted the offer
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
..and by hang out i don't mean fucking then going back home i mean let's get something to eat & watch a movie and fuck sometime in between.
You know you're old when you’re masturbating and you pull your hip
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