I wanna go to beed woth a nboy
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
I walked into the bathroom of the hotel and she's in the bath tub with a guy she met a day ago. They were sharing a shrimp cocktail platter and shot gunning bud lights. Oh and it was noon.
The heart of my unhappiness in my job is that it's not a place where coworkers and I can draw dicks on everything to amuse each other
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
I don't think you should be sorry for such memorable sex that I yell your name when you aren't around.
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
I got stabbed with a couple of chip crumbs during sex Saturday. Further proof I need to stop eating snacks in bed
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
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