We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
i wonder what megan fox's vagina feels like.
Heaven soaked bacon.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
Well I sent him a pic of my vagina and sent back a pic of his puppy....so there's that
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
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