Walk of Shame. In a state park.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I refuse to have another spring break doomed by pregnancy.
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
I'm very aware of my heart moving the blood in my body.
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
I definitely almost just pulled a condom out of my purse instead of money for my dad.
I need you to get the emergency bail money out if the stuffed panda and go to the police station tot bail me out. I should be there in 20 minutes.
Randomize