Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.

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  (630): So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless. http://tfl.nu/sjt0
  Replies (2) Good night (1177) Bad night (525)
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  (319): View more from Iowa

  Sponge bath it is.

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  (319): Sponge bath it is. http://tfl.nu/r4q1
  Replies (2) Good night (1003) Bad night (494)
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  (913): View more from Kansas

  I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough.

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  (913): I just busted my ass on the ice in front of my entire AA meeting. As if being there wasn't embarrassing enough. http://tfl.nu/u5ru
  Replies (26) Good night (724) Bad night (4143)
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  (651): View more from Minnesota

  dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw

  (651): View more from Minnesota

  by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix

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  (651): dude so we were eating nacho cheese popcorn and chasing it with cole slaw (651): by the way nacho cheese popcorn is me making popcorn and then adding milk butter and mac n cheese mix http://tfl.nu/95z8
  Replies (17) Good night (1364) Bad night (4258)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"

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  (860): at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!" http://tfl.nu/hob5
  Replies (12) Good night (5551) Bad night (1157)
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  (586): View more from Michigan

  We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine

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  (586): We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine http://tfl.nu/mpc6
  Replies (15) Good night (2877) Bad night (1556)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer.

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  (207): Last time I heard from you, you were double fisting strawberry milk and wine. Answer this text so I know you're still alive. Bonus points for a coherent answer. http://tfl.nu/w95z
  Replies (3) Good night (2780) Bad night (1288)
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  (252): View more from North Carolina

  See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket

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  (252): See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket http://tfl.nu/0lhc
  Replies (11) Good night (1470) Bad night (539)
• Favorite

  (205): View more from Alabama

  ...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot.

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  (205): ...if you're living vicariously thought me, that was a great blow job you just gave in the B&N parking lot. http://tfl.nu/jxup
  Replies (8) Good night (1444) Bad night (576)
• Favorite

  (207): View more from Maine

  Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.

  (617): View more from Massachusetts

  You would never do this sober.

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  (207): Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good. (617): You would never do this sober. http://tfl.nu/h01i
  Replies (9) Good night (1321) Bad night (503)
• Favorite

  (954): View more from Florida

  tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position

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  (954): tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position http://tfl.nu/ss2w
  Replies (5) Good night (1050) Bad night (406)
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  (701): View more from North Dakota

  You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator

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  (701): You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator http://tfl.nu/12pr
  Replies (3) Good night (675) Bad night (393)
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  (401): View more from Rhode Island

  I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.

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  (401): I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car. http://tfl.nu/oyb7
  Replies (3) Good night (274) Bad night (829)
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  (610): View more from Pennsylvania

  Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative

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  (610): Nothing is working I'm going to die alone and on hold with a State Farm representative http://tfl.nu/dzmt
  Replies (3) Good night (594) Bad night (508)
• Favorite

  (803): View more from South Carolina

  I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had.

  (304): View more from West Virginia

  Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little.

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  (803): I didn't realize how trashy of a night we had. (304): Welllll, you did eat a cherry out of my pussy. So I think that classes it up a little. http://tfl.nu/dkf0
  Replies (6) Good night (1152) Bad night (390)

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