he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
Being college poor has reached a new low. I am giving up on masturbating so i can save money on toilet paper
yeah, you were trying to hump the doorman.
when did we get a doorman?
we were also in the wrong building...
And I was somehow convinced to wash the glassware at the bar topless.
Never again. Her vagina looked like a sad old man.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
She's a freaking stalker dude, it's like having some kind of cartoon animal just following around everywhere
His penis smells like laundry I just wanted to cuddle it
My old dealer would be proud of the drug cocktail I just took for my back pain.
I'm pathetic. I'm eating cream puffs in the bath and crying a little.
We've had gay sex and pie, the holiday season has officially begun.