Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
I just found a grey hair. On my nipple. Fuck you too, Mother Nature.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I loaned him a tie and then had to tie it for him. I'm like his weird lesbian girlfriend.
if you didn't cry because you couldn't find me and then pee your bed, your wingman status would totally be revoked for leaving me at that party.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
Randomize
