Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
i just compared eating a chick out to "gargling a cheeto"
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
well I have to shit but I'm too hungover to push, and I snorted advil so I wouldn't have to swallow it and throw up.. hungover is an understatement.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I tried to steal a Mike's Hard sign last night but it didn't work out
why what happened?
Well it was going fine.. until the bouncer noticed the three foot steel lemon sticking out of my jacket.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
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