no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I still cannot believe I yelled at every guy at the bar "you wanna get in this clam?!"
Only way we know if he truly fits in is if we spill straight vodka on the floor and his first instinctnis to lick it up. Otherwise, gameover.
She is a social worker. An actual good person trying to save the world. I feel like every time I give her an orgasm God wipes a little smudge off of my shit list.
I gained confidence after I found out she was a lesbian. At least that way I could flirt with her and convince her to buy me taco bell after the bar
Showering in my swimsuit in hopes of getting the beer smell out.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
All I need is a morbidly obese man masturbating at the other end of the car and I'll complete the CTA Horror Trifecta.
Sorry my friend with benefits tried to run you over with his car
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
Randomize
