Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
Alls I know is that his gf looked like Beyonce and he looked like Babar
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
I was high and he had on a gorilla suit. Of course I had to take a picture with him
Your a disgrace to smokers everywhere
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I was carrying around a bottle of Jameson yelling rescue me
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
Is the mullet a good, great, or horrible idea before we leave for college
He was jealous of me and threatened by me. I'm like, just cause I could fuck your girlfriend doesn't mean I'm going to
She's not even my type. She doesn't have a penis or a drug problem
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
