So I'm sober and underage, being hit on by a groom-to-be with braces...is it a bad thing that I'm enjoying it?
how many beers do i need before it is acceptable to sleep with sam
enough that when i make fun of you for it tomorrow you wont even remember it happening
Someone took a freaking dump on a roll of toilet paper. Next to the toilet. No shit in the toilet. Just on the roll of toilet paper.
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Facebook lets you pick usernames now. You'd better log on and get yours before homewreckingwhore is taken...
Why do I always have sex on the first date when I know it demotes me to booty call girl?
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Reason #57 I am going to fail the bar... it's Tuesday and i'm drunk at Toy Story 3.
Just proof I should've brought the airhorn with me to class.
Come over and play the Jeter 3000 drinking game. You drink if the commentators say "captain" or "3000". I'll drink if they say "overrated" or "past his prime".
We fed him just...so many bright colored crayons when he was blacked out. I hope he looks at his shits because this could be all for nothing
Your ex roommate is making out w the kid who pees on floors and it's kinda funny
Guy just walked into the bathroom with only socks on and took a 5second shit. It is taking me longer to type this than for him to shit, wash hands, and leave the bathroom. WTF? Still wondering why he only had socks on.
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