Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
wtf are you talking about? You vomit-splattered the cop from the balcony. The cop YOU called because you drunk-dialed 911 because a 5 year old ate the last donut.
it was a krispy kreme
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
