it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
His mom took away his car and made him quit his job.
HE'S 26!!!
Mowing drunk should be an olympic sport...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He's in bed with me right now. I'm wearing a towel and all I could wish for is my freedom. And pizza.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
In case you were wondering...putting everclear into a humidifier DOES get you really really drunk.
History professor is at the bar. Hurry! There's only so many A's he could give before it starts to look bad.
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
just called AAA to get my keys out of me car and then afterwards realized they were in my pocket...stoner life
I'm not talking about Donald Trump in the midst of sending you nudes
Do you ever go take a shit and end up sitting on the toilet for like 45 minutes wondering what the fuck you're doing with your life?
Everyday my friend, everyday.
I got some blow and a hand job from one of the strippers. So I guess I'm getting over the divorce.
Randomize