We were having sex on the balcony and this guy walked by, so drunkily i said "dont move, he cant see us if we dont move."
I knew my chances of getting laid had increased after she walked into my room and yelled "DICK TIME"
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
In 2009 his now husband dressed in a sailor onesie and heels for pride so he needs to REMEMBER how to party
I spent all the money my grandpa gave me for Christmas last night….solid start to 2015
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it weird that my ex and the dude I'm talking to now both only have one testicle? Apparently I've found my type..
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Hey, remember that time a week ago when we walk-of-shamed literally down the Vegas Strip at 8:45am and I had one broken heel?
You ruined the universe
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
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