hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
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i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
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What's a nice way of saying "You fell asleep, and I got bored, so I made out with your brother"?
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
When we started the night I was in zebra wedges & she was in my black boots... I woke up wearing pink flip flops & the mirror on my rental is fuxked up. Wtf happened last night?
I'm not just straddling the line between love and hate, I'm dry humping the shit out of it
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