he just sent me a friend request on facebook. i wish it were physically possible to vomit on him through the internet.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
WHYAREWHITEGUYSSOBADINBED?! What the fuck went wrong, evolution?
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do u ever find yourself high af, watching American ninja warrior and crying at the athletes stories?
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
Be there in 6 mins I’m smell like fireball. and strippers and need to use your showers before go home
I couldn't be more proud to be a cougar. Just wondering how these twenty somethings learned how to fuck so well? Must be porn.
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