I hate when you've made an ugly girl's day by having sex with her, and then she gets greedy and wants to cuddle after you cum.
Psycho is an understatement. U were running around the house screaming IM UNDER THE IMPERIOUS CURSE
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Seriously... There's something wrong here. I'm drinking vodka to mask the smell of chocolate on my breath before I get home and he finds out. I fucking hate couple dieting...
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Just a heads up, the coffee pot is filled with Jager.
God you people are gross. Come collect your unconscious friend.
hotdog in my bra and i still managed to score. Got a bit freaked when he tried to eat it though. I paid 3 bucks for that fucking hotdog.
Remember that girl from my stats. class that I ran into at the bar 2 weeks ago? She literally hasn't been to class once since I told her I sit behind her.
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
What happened to fro yo and sex?
I'm just more comfortable with the bondage
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I'm not wearing pants, but I'm wearing a tiara.
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