Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
She compared sex to doing dishes."You scrub them until they're wet."
chlamydia ends and my period begins. this isnt real life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
i'm not a hellocoptur, but youer in a dorm ans im un a dorm
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
Hey history final, how's it feel to be raped in the ass by my steel cock of ACADEMIC PERFECTION?
you are way too vulgar to be a girl
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had the weirdest moment. Made eye contact at the bar with a girl who has seen my vagina.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I remember reading the word "lift" so I did. The alarn went off, and I thought to myself "what dumbass pulls the fucking fire alarm?" and then I realized it was me...
He made a group chat with him, his wife, & I. Is this really life!??
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