making cat noises will not fix the situation.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
I am growing concerned with the number of people here in cowboy hats
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Someone snapchat me a pic of you topless laying on the bar with Scotty pouring a bottle of tequila down your throat. IT'S NOT EVEN ELEVEN YET.
School starts next week
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
The struggle bus has heated seats and stops at Dunkin on Friday mornings so I'll be okay.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I was just at Kroger and saw some guy with a steelers balloon... ran up to him and popped it. NO RAGRETS.
Vegas never ceases to amaze me. Hung out with a stripper from ATL all night and got nuthin, but the next night meet a bride-to-be who gives me a bj in the elevator.
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