It's pouring out. I am cold, wet, and miserable.... Kind of reminds me of our sleepover last night.
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
It was confusing and full of hummus
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night he tried to put me in their garbage can and then sprayed me with a fire extinguisher in their kitchen...that house is always interesting
I told her that I thought she needed an oral mammogram. With me being pre-med she bought it.
you can't wake me up at 4am to suck your dick and then give me a high five at the bar
Okay wait let me power puke and then we can go dancing
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
A man and his most likely hooker just bought us Taco Bell.
My dad is so drunk he attempted to ride my two year old cousin's tricycle. For a solid five minutes.
tell her i changed her phone's unlock password to be the length of my fully erect penis in centimeters. I'll be in my room for the next two hours.
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize