she calls it her "sourpuss" because everyone makes that face when they see it.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Don't judge me. He's really sexy for a 17 year old. We made nasty in the womens bathroom at the beach. Don't worry. I wore sandals in there.
None of that is ok.
can you look at this picture and tell me if you think this my kid?
I was freaked out. No man over 50 is allowed to touch me. Ever. Unless you're Michael Bolton. Then please do.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
You beat him at the shot competition, and proceeded to rub it in while telling everyone to "ASK ME A MATH QUESTION!!!"
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Cops just came and got two guys out of my class. I can't do college. Seriously cannot rage at this school anymore.
Did you hook up with him before or after he shaved off half of his eyebrow?
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
